Keijo Note Dark Yagami and the Haunted Chest
by D'arkYagam'i
Summary: What happens... when Near becomes a gost... on Halloween... and keijo happens? FIND OUT!


**KEIJO NOTE! DARK YAGAMI AND THE HAUNTED CHEST**

" **It was hallowe** en and although the house

Not a creacher was stirring not even…. a ghost"

Near peed his pants so hard they melted

"WTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTF" he squirrled as he was blasted out the window on a jet of pee

"LMAO" lamoed Dark lmaoing. But he wasn't lmaoing for long. Cos Near… DIED

"And that's what happened one year ago this very night!" Dark said with an evil grin… TO NEAR

"WTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTF" Nears ghost screeched and he also blasted out the window and double died and became two gosts.

AND THAT'S WHEN THE STORY CAN REALLY START!

IMAGINE THE XFILES SONG HERE

DOODLYDOODLYDOODLYDOO

DOODOODOODOODOODOO

AND THE TITLE FLYS IN ALL

 **DARK**

 **YAGAMI**

 **AND**

 **THE**

 **HAUNTED**

 **CHESTS!**

AND BLOOD COMES OUT AND YOU HEAR A LADY SCREAM… BUT A HORROR SCREAM OR A SEXY SCREAM? IT'S A MYSTERY…. FORNOW!

YOU NEED TO BE SCARRED FOR THIS FIC SO YOU SHOULD TAKE OFF YOUR PANTS AND PUT A SHOO ON YOUR HEAD AND THEN YOULL BE SCARRED OF PEEPS WALKING IN AND SEEING ALL NO PANTS AND SHOOHEAD

 **ONE YEAR LATER… ON HALLOWEEN!**

Samanther who had the biggest chests in the world and Sayu who dint but still was not bad and Misa who was also a lesbean were cutting up punkins in the kitchen. All the punkins were scary except for the ones that were sexy. There was one with a vampire on it and one with Blud on it doing the bird and one with lady chests.

"LOL Do you know what would be funny?" Samanther asked licking punkin juice off her fingers all sexy

"A joke?" said Misa

"If we did a luigi board and brought back the ghost of Near who double died one year ago this very night?" said Sayu

"I was gonna say a joke but that sounds f-cking lit" Samanther said and she got a new punkin and cut it into a luigi board and they fired all the punkins like candles and held hands but not for sexy reasons just to bring back the ghosts of near.

"NEAR….. FAR….. WHEREEVER YOU ARE?" [GET IT. IT'S A JOKE BASED ON **TIT-** ANIC [GET IT? LIKE LADY CHESTS? IT A DOUBLE JOKE!] There was a scratch on the sealing like a bunch of rats where munching on the roof. All the candles went spooky and the wind came and it went dark and in the dark…. WAS NEAR!

"LOL This is awesome" Misa said but then Near did the thing where he spinned his head right round to look at Misa

"" _You you have have nice nice lady chests lady chests_ "" he said because he was a double ghost and said stuff two times

His head spinned even further to look at Sayu and went ""WHOA WHAO"" and lego shot out his ears

"" _YOU YOU HAVE HAVE THE THE EVEN EVEN BETTER CHESTY CHESTY BIT BITS!""_

"Lol take that MISA"

But then Nears head went even twistier like a f-cking snake or something cos he wanted to see…. SAMANTHERS

He got a double nose bleed and the jet nearly jetted him out the window to become a 3-times gost BUT IT DIDN'T

"" _JIMMY JIMMY CRICKET CRICKET THOSE THOSE ARE ARE THE THE F-CKING F-KING BEST BEST CHESTS CHESTS IN IN THE THE WORLD WORLD""_

Samanther did one bird at Sayu and one bird at Misa for a totle of two birds.

"" _CAN CAN I I HAVE HAVE A A CLOSER LOOK CLOSER LOOK?""_ Nears double ghost asked and Samanther felt sorry for him cos he was a double ghost and he never saw milkjumbles before plus she was dead happy cos he said hers were the best and you can always trust a double gost.

"Yeah check THESE suckas [AN it's a joke but you don't know it yet] out" she said ripping her shirt off and it was a bra made by nasa under it cos they were the only peeps who could build a bra that could hold her bounders cos they were so big they had gravity.

Near got close to look AND THE GRAVITY SUCKED HIM IN [AN that was the joke]. One ghost IN EACH BOSOM!

 **NOW THE EVIL HAUNTING WOULD START**

Dark was in his room with Night doing science magic on the supercomputer. Light was watching and being all like "HEY WHATS THAT?" "HEY IS THAT THE MATRIX?" "HEY CAN I PLAY MIITOMO ON THAT?" cos hes an idiot and he don't even got any miitomo frends anyway cos noone plays mittomo now so its stupid.

Something went SMASSH [THAT'S ALSO A JOKE. IT'S A SECRET WHY BUT ILL GIVE A HINT: SM-ASS-H ;] ] and Dark fort it was just Light being a idiot again

BUT ITW ASNT

I mean it partly was cos Light was scared and dropped Nears lego star wars death star that took like 2 weeks to build even tho it was just a soccerball with darth vaders head glooed on

Dark took his Everything Note for safety and Night took her Sex Note for sexty and Light took his death note and they all

wnet down the stares and what they saw was amazing

Samanther was on the table in just her Nasa bikini and Sayu and Misa were also dressed for the pool. They jumped and turned there butts to bump Samanther off the table.

But Samanther did a flip and pressed out her chest and Sayu and Misa bounced off it like balloons off a fright train [get it? HALLOWEEN!] and bounced into the walls and got KOED

"Whats happening?" Light pipped

"They're doing… KEIJO!" Dark grinaced

"What's that?"

 **PAUSE**

SO HERE I WALK IN! ME! THE REAL DARK YAGAMI! ON TWITTER IM REALDARKYAGAMI! AND I GET A CHAIR AND SIT BACKWOODS LIKE A COOL DUDE AND GET A PROJECTER AND SAY THIS

"IM HERE TO GIVE YOU THE FOUR ELEVEN ON KEIJO IN A SUPER AN!

"SO HERES THE DEAL"

I CLICK AND A POWERPOINT APPEARS OF NOZOMI AND SAYAKA FIGHTING BUTTS WITH EACHOTHER

"KEIJO IS THE BEST ANIME AND YOU SHULD WATCH IT RITE NOW TO UNDERSTAND AND MAYBE GET HAPPIED UP ;) ;) ;) :0 BUT IF YOU CANT THEN ITS ABOUT A JAPANISH SPORT WHERE LADDYS HAVE TO FIGHT WITH THERE BUTTS AND CHESTS BUT THEY HAVE SUPERPOWERS LIKE VACUM BUTT CANON AND BOOB HIPNOSIS (CAN I SAY BOOB ON FANFICNET?) AND SYCHIC BUTT HANDS AND WEDGY CELERATION AND STUFF"

I CLICK AGAIN AND YOU SEE NOZOMI DO A VACUM BUTT CANON AND THE VACUM IS SO HARD THAT EVERY1S SWIMSUITS GET RIPPED AN FOR SOME REASON THERE CHESTS DON'T HAVE THE CIRCLE BITS IN THE MIDDLE BUT ITS STILL KINDA HOT

THEN THE BLOND ONE DOES A BOOB HIPNOSIS AND THAT IS EVEN HOTTER

"SO THAT'S THE DEAL! PEACE OUT SUCKAS IM OFF TO RITE MORE DEATH NOTE FOR NETFLICKS!" AND I FLY AWAY IN MY NETFLICKS SPACEHELICOPTER

 **UNPAUSE**

"Wow thanks Real D'ark Yagam'i!" said Night and looked at Samanther "Why did you just keijo our frends?"

"I cant help it!" Samanther moaned "Theres a double gost posessing me and it makes me keijo every1 and if we don't stop it IT WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD COS THERE ARE NO BOOBAJOOBS (CAN I SAY THAT? IT NOT BOOBS) ON EARTH THAT CAN BEET MINE!"

"Not so fast!" gerned Dark and he got the everything note and writ "MAKE NIGHT HAVE BETTER CHESTY BULGES THAN SAMANTHER"

BUT THE EVERYTHING NOTE WENT ON FIRE

"F-CK I FORGOT THAT THE EVERYTHING NOTE GOES ON FIRE IF YOU MAKE IT DO IMPOSABLE STUFF. AN ITS IMPOSABLE FOR THERE TO BE BETTER LADY BAUBLES THAN SAMANTHERS! THAT'S WHY SHE MY GF LOVE YOU BABE"

"But what can we dooooooo?"

Lights mom walks in and she got keijoed as well even though she future Samanther cos she had to hide her juggles so Darks brain bomb woodnt explode.

"I HAVE AN IDEA…" Night gasped an she took the everything note. "MAYBE MY JINGLE BELLS WILL NEVER BE AS BETTER THAN SAMANTHERS…..BUT IT DON'T SAY NOTHING ABOUT MY BUTT"

So she writ "MAKE NIGHT HAVE THE BEST BUMMOCKS IN THE WORLD" and the Everythijng Note did its evil but not evil sparkles and the sparkles flew around her legs and her backside went the best in the world and IDK Im not an assman but every1 seems to like kim cardassian so it was lick hers I GUESS and every1 took photos and it BRAKED THE INTERNET! But TV was there so peeps could still watch and it was gonna be THE SEXXXXXXXXXIEST FIGHT SINCE SAMANTHER DID TH MILKSHAKE!

Night put on a swimsuit and got on the table with Samanther (AN IN KEIJO THIS CALLED LAND!) and said "Bring it b-tch!" and she bringed it.

Samanther thwacked her with her chests and it was like being run over by a milk truck except it was soft and made of skin and she went flying but stayed on the land. Now Night did a butt gatting which is when lots of buts come out your butt and they battered Samanther and she almost fell over but dint

"I will have to do SUPER POWER" they both said at the same time and did wedgy power and they got SO FAST that peeps count see anything and they had to get super fast cameras just to see the sexxxxxy action

Then Samanther…. DID THE BOOB HIPNOSIS. She jimbled her jubblies side to side and every1 had to stop to watch AND THEY GOT UNDER HER SPELL

"No…. I AM GETTING….. HIPNOTIC!" Night screamed but then she had an idea. She turned over and did a BUTT FIGURE OF 8 and it was bumbling all over the place with a jiggle and Samanther got HIPNOTIC OF HER.

[AN THIS IS TOO SEXXXXXY! ;] ;0 ;| ;P ]

"NOW TIM….. FOR MY ULTIMATE MOVE!" and Night id…. THE VACUM BUTT CANON

And the vacum was so strong that it pulled Nears goasts out and blasted them through the window and both ghosts died and then there was four gosts! And that happned…. ONE YEAR AGO ON THIS VERY NIGHT!" Dark churtled.

"WTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTF" peed the four Near gosts and they got blasted out the window on four jets of gost pee and died and then there were eight Near gosts

AND THEY ALL DIED HAPPILY EVER AFTER + + + + - it's a grave yard


End file.
